38 Weeks

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How could I forget to post the weekly belly picture?!  Probably because right now, I’m preoccupied with thoughts of having this baby any day now!  I’ve had some low pelvic pressure off and on, but obviously nothing productive or promising.  I always get so ready to have my babies and get back to normal, however, when I really start thinking about it, I have my reservations.  I’ve had awesome labors and deliveries (except the twins), but the reality is is that it still hurts and I know what I’m facing.  Luckily I tend to have super quick labors and easy deliveries, so that part eases the tension a bit.

Since I’ve had so many different birthing situations (unmedicated hospital birth, 3 homebirths attended by a midwife, 1 accidentally unattended homebirth, and an emergency c-section with a spinal block), I’m trying to decide how to proceed with this birth.  We are planning a VBAC (vaginal birth after cesarian, another birthing scenario to add to my collection) hospital birth, but as far as the epidural goes, I’m totally undecided.  I feel like I’ve made it through 5 births with no pain meds, and that it would be ridiculous to try an epidural now.  I feel like I need to prove to myself that I can do it again, especially since this will be my first VBAC.  My hubby insists that after all of my unmedicated births, that I don’t need to prove anything to anyone at this point.  Part of me wants to have the epidural just to see what birth with one is like, but deep down I feel like that is cheating myself out of the pride of giving birth the way it was meant to be.  When I’m birthing, I fully count on my body to tell me what to do, when to do  it, and how to do it.  It’s never let me down, so why start now?  My biggest fear with the epidural is being stuck in the spinal column with a dang needle.  The spinal block with the twins was horrific.  It took the doctor 4 times to get it in, meanwhile, the first twin was making his breech debut while the dr was sticking a large needle in my back.  Anyone who says getting a spinal is like a bee sting is surely full of you-know-what.  It more likely resembled being kicked in the jaw by a mule.  A very large, mean, and ugly mule at that.  I guess I will make the decision on what to do when the time comes.

My next doctor appointment is on Thursday morning, so I will have an update then.  I’m really hoping that one of my next updates will be a “baby M is here” headline.  With the way I usually go past my due date, I’m not putting much stock in an early birth at this point, however, if you would be so kind as to say a little prayer that it happens soon, it would be much, much appreciated.  Truth be known, I’m ready to be done!

 

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One response »

  1. I replied on FB but also just wanted to say it here, too. If during labor, you for some reason feel like you absolutely need an epidural, then by all means get it. If you are getting one “just to see how it feels”, after 5 natural births, I’m pretty sure the feeling will be disappointment. I don’t mean disappointment in yourself for getting one, but just that the whole thing will pale in comparison to your natural births. I’m saying this as somebody who got an epidural the first time (and every intervention that came with it, and just narrowly avoided a c-section). My first birth was so traumatic, and I can’t even imagine how devastating it would have been to have that kind of birth AFTER knowing what natural birth felt like. The difference between the 2 experiences is so much more than feeling pain vs not feeling pain.

    There are also risks, as I’m sure you’re aware of. Even though the risk of rupture with a VBAC is so low, if it were to happen, you would know sooner if you could feel what was going on. I’m not sure how restricted you were with your natural hospital birth, but with the epidural, you are stuck in bed on your back. Then there are all of the interventions that come along with it.

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